August 4, 2010

Cine-Smackdown: #61-#70

The fourth cine-smackdown, dudes! This has taken a lot longer than I thought to get to, but now I'm forty movies in! Goalz.

61. Sullivan's Travels
62. American Graffiti
The African Queen
Raiders of the Lost Ark
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
A Clockwork Orange

I had previously seen Cabaret, Network, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Tootsie and A Clockwork Orange. An appropriately diverse list.

Of these ten, which would I move further up the list?
My first instinct says Network. The acting, direction and screenplay are all textbook examples of how it's done. I'd probably stick with that, although Tootsie is a close second, for the same reasons. It's just that we think of dramas as much more important and more historically significant, don't we? But on the list of best comedies put out by the AFI, Tootsie is #2. Just sayin'.

Of these ten, which would I get rid of?
Now my bias is coming through. In the last smackdown I said The Wild Bunch (and I stick by that) and now I'm picking the western again. Unforgiven just didn't ring my bell at all. It's not even that westerns aren't my cup of tea (although they aren't) but I didn't find it visually or cinematically exciting... did you?? Clint Eastwood. Try again.

Who in these movies do I want as my best friend?
I think maybe it's weird to say Teri Garr's character in Tootsie but maybe that's me searching for a hag. She's just so endearing, I can't help it! Jessica Lange and Bill Murray can come too. And if they wanted, the two captains of the African Queen could party with me. Something tells me they'd be hard drinkers. And The Toad from American Graffiti, especially if I'm underage and he can get me liquor.

Who in these movies do I want to have my back in a bar fight?
Indiana Jones seems like an obvious answer: he saved Marion Ravenwood out of almost every skirmish she got herself into, and he beats up every bad guy in the place without problem (except if there are snakes around).

Who in these movies is your worst frienemy?
Wow. Nearly anyone from Network, Woolf, Unforgiven and A Clockwork Orange... although something tells me I'd at least have the good sense to stay away from Faye Dunaway ... and the droogs. Cabaret's Emcee seems like a nice enough guy but I have no idea what's going on in his little mind.

Who do I take home to Mom?
If I have to narrow it down, it's probably Charlie Allnut (The African Queen). My mom would approve of Humphrey Bogart. Now I just have to get Katharine Hepburn to back off. Fat chance.

You're going on a date with these movies. Who do you agree to meet for coffee but never call again?
Unforgiven: I wanted to give you and your kind a chance, but you just disappoint me over and over. Am I destructive for thinking it could ever work?

Who do you agree to meet for coffee, and then say you'll call but never do?
Sullivan's Travels: you're a lot of fun, but you get kinda needlessly heavy.

Who do you agree to meet for coffee, and then not show up?
A Clockwork Orange, obviously: I mean, c'mon.

Who do you meet for a first date, ends up staying the night and makes you breakfast in the morning?
Brian (Cabaret) might make me a delicious German breakfast ... sausage, biscuits and gravy please! And a side of sexual ambiguity!

Who do you meet for a first date, ends up staying the night and then leaves in the morning without saying goodbye ... and steals your favorite sweater?
Alex (A Clockwork Orange) would do all this AND probably rape and/or disfigure me. Yikes. Don't let him in when he says there's been a terrible accident!

What other questions would you have asked about these movies? I'd love more ideas! Leave your thoughts, reactions, passionate defenses and harsh critiques in the comments!

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